Things of Little Consequence

Today I want to devote an entire blog post to all the issues I have with Avril Lavigne’s ‘Sk8er Boi’. Stupid? Yes. But the dang song is stuck in my head and there is so much wrong with it that I feel the need to get this rant out of my system.

Let’s go line by line, shall we?

He was a boy
She was a girl
Can I make it anymore obvious?

So far, fine. Girl, boy, classic love story set up.

He was a punk.
She did ballet.
What more can I say?

Quite a bit more, actually. I get that this is a song, and this line is used to reflect that they had pretty different personalities, but being a punk/doing ballet does not epitomize you as a person.

He wanted her.
She’d never tell.
Secretly she wanted him as well.

Here’s where I start having issues. Besides the fact that we’re using the word ‘wanted’ instead of ‘was in love with’ (which says to me that this is obviously a really superficial relationship), we also have to deal with the fact that this ballerina girl is ashamed of ‘wanting’ this guy. I’m sorry, but if you really care about someone, you’re not ashamed of them – no matter what others think. Which leads us to the next line.

And all of her friends
Stuck up their nose.
And they had a problem with his baggy clothes.

In my time I’ve seen two ways that this can be interpreted: 1) Ballerina Girl’s friends are all snobs and need to get over themselves, and are also not Ballerina Girl’s real friends, because if they were her real friends, they’d like him because she liked him and they want her to be happy. 2) Ballerina Girl’s friends care too much about her to see her go off with this punk/skater dude who doesn’t exactly sound like a savory person. I mean, clothes are one thing, but personality and behavior are another. (If one of my friends liked a guy who was treated people badly or didn’t have respect for authority or otherwise made him a bad influence, I would have issues, and pull a Mr. Darcy from Pride and Prejudice. “My objections to the marriage were not merely those which I last night acknowledged to have the utmost force of passion to put aside, in my own case; the want of connection could not be so great an evil to my friend as to me…”) Either way, this line is just wrong, juxtaposed with the next one.

He was a skater boy, she said see ya later boy.
He wasn’t good enough for her.
She had a pretty face but her head was up in space.
She needed to come back down to earth.

Okay, so this one also has two interpretations, the former of which is more likely: Ballerina Girl listened to her snobby friends and turned down Skater/Punk Dude not because he was bad for her morally, but because he was poor or a punk or not a ballerina or some other superficial reason. The less likely reason is that Ballerina Girl turned down Skater/Punk Dude because he was legitimately morally bad for her, as her friends told her, and Avril Lavigne is mocking this decision. So either she was superficial, or she wasn’t superficial and Lavigne is calling her an idiot for leaving a guy who was apparently hot/talented.

Five years from now, she sits at home feeding the baby, she’s all alone.
She turns on TV and guess who she sees?
Skater boy rockin’ up MTV.
She calls up her friends.
They already know
And they’ve all got tickets to see his show.
She tags along, stands in the crowd.
Looks up at the man that she turned down.

Okay, this is the part of the song that bothers me the most. She has a baby, which, assuming the best case scenario, means that she was in love with someone who was also in love with her, and they got married and had a baby and he’s either still there and just not present in this scene, or he left/something happened to him. So then this girl, with her child, born of a man she obviously loved very much and should either be remembering or mourning or something, goes to a concert to regret her decisions because the guy she liked as a teenager is a rock star now. What is this? Is she supposed to throw away everything she had with the father of her child because this dude is a rock star? Does she have no integrity? What real woman would experience regret at a loving, obviously fruitful, if short-lived relationship because a relationship that could have happened with a famous dude didn’t? I mean, come on! I’ve had crushes on people before, and I don’t think in a million years that, after having grown up, gotten married and had children, I would go back to having a crush on them because they can play a guitar moderately well.

He was a skater boy, she said see ya later boy.
He wasn’t good enough for her.
Now he’s a superstar
Slammin’ on his guitar
To show pretty faces what he’s worth.

This line is also obnoxious. Because your worth is entirely in the fact that you’re a superstar! Apparently! It’s like, “Hey, this girl turned me down. What should I do? I know! Not change my personality or anything at all, not maybe shape up my life and become a respectable gentleman so this doesn’t happen again – nah! I’ll become a ROCKSTAR, so I can have a bunch of groupies and girls who have no self confidence/worth hanging all over me, and then she’ll regret not dating me because I’m FAMOUS now!” In what universe does this make sense? If I got turned down by a guy for reasons based on station of life/personality/whatever, I’d either a) move on, or b) in following the same route as Skater/Punk Dude, go for a profession that actually shows my self worth! Like, hey, I was an awesome girl, I’m a writer/famous cellist/charity worker with a great personality now, too bad you couldn’t see past my non-designer clothes and really get to know me! Instead, this guy, who was turned down FOR SUPERFICIAL REASONS goes off and pursues ONE OF THE MOST SUPERFICIAL CAREERS EVER. What’s this girl supposed to think? “Aw, dang it, look at how famous that guy is. I really missed out – he would have made me happy… I mean, how could that relationship go wrong? He’s so famous, everything would be perfect and his riches and fame would make me happy…” Logic check, please.

Sorry girl but you missed out.
Well tough luck that boy’s mine now.
We are more than just good friends.
This is how the story ends.
Too bad that you couldn’t see…
See the man that boy could be.
There is more than meets the eye,
I see the soul that is inside.

Okay. So now Lavigne is mocking this girl who made life choices that may or may not have been wrong, after ridiculing the fact that she MAJORLY SCREWED UP by not dating this über famous guitar player when she had the chance and therefore her life is terrible and she will never be happy ever just because she didn’t date a rock star… And then she has the nerve to throw in a line about ‘soul’ – Avril, I’m pretty positive from everything you’ve said so far that you don’t really care about this guy’s soul. You’re dating him because he’s a rock star and making fun of the girl who didn’t. If he had a winning personality and a soul that would have made him right for this girl, he probably wouldn’t have decided to become a rock star to show her what she was missing. (Try a humanitarian or a doctor, if we’re going to go down the career route – not that someone’s career showcases their personality. Honestly, he should have actually talked to her, since she obviously cared – well, ‘wanted’ this guy. If he had such a deep soul or whatever, she would love him regardless of the bagginess of his clothing.)

He’s just a boy, and I’m just a girl.
Can I make it anymore obvious?
We are in love.
Haven’t you heard how we rock each other’s world?

Yay, Avril, you love the guy. Good for you. I hope you feel better, taunting the girl who almost had him first. ALSO, you seem to think that she would be in your shoes if she hadn’t turned him down. So, two questions for you: 1) how many relationships that start as teenagers last for very long? 2) How many relationships with ROCK STARS last for very long? All I can see as that Ballerina Girl would have dated this guy for superficial reasons, and now she’d be in the same place she is now, except she went through a breakup with this guy – even more painful – and would not have a baby, a baby who is probably pretty dang precious to her.

I’m with the skater boy I said see ya later boy.
I’ll be backstage after the show.
I’ll be at the studio singing the song we wrote about a girl you used to know.

Well, that’s hardly necessary, is it?

Anyway, I know it doesn’t really matter and it’s kind of stupid to complain about a pop song that came out in 2002, but it just really bothers me that this is society’s view on women. Didn’t date a rock star? Life wasted. Hope you enjoy regretting that decision until the day you die. Like you can’t live a happy, full life without dating someone famous or cool! And now you’re stuck with a baby from pursuing true love – so, oops, looks like your whole life is ruined! I, for one, hope that I marry a giant dork who isn’t cool or famous in the slightest, and then have a gazillion kids so my life is as ruined as I can possibly get it, and I KNOW that will make me incredibly happy, despite the fact that Avril Lavigne and the rest of the world things it won’t.

I’ll do my question post on Wednesday, providing I get some more questions. Leave them in the comments, and as always, thanks for reading!

~Hero

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7 comments on “Things of Little Consequence

  1. fuzzymango says:

    I just wanted to drop in and say that you’re not alone in being frustrated with song lyrics. I have similarly ranty feelings about the Bruno Mars song “Grenade”. Maybe someday I’ll do a post like this where I break down why it bothers me so much. In the meantime, because I love parodies, I figure I’ll share this: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4TVVoH7-CKc Because these lyrics ACTUALLY MAKE SENSE, and learning them has allowed me to mentally replace the real lyrics every time the song comes on the radio. 😛

  2. elinormarie says:

    This is is annoying. All of her songs are 🙂 But I totally agree with you! Thanks for making my head hurt during the summer<—jk!

    Elinor

  3. Rachel R. says:

    That song is stupid. Glad that you got that out of your system. 😉 I like paradies too, this one is my favorite http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5apUnAIIaMI 😀

  4. Sami says:

    JMJ+AMDG
    Hero,
    THANK YOU!!! I really needed enlightening! (And if that sounded sarcastic, I didn’t mean it! 😛 )
    You are so funny/intellectual (do those go hand in hand?)! I’ll be looking into your blog again! 🙂
    Love,
    Sami

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